Friday, October 26, 2012


FWR says: There is no silver bullet for family wellness

We humans are really dumb. We don’t learn from the lessons all around us. Our plants and pets get it and we don’t.

For a healthy tomato plant we know it needs the right soil, fertilizer, sunshine, weeding and water all in the right balance. For our dog, we know it needs space, a safe bed, right food, right medicine and lots of attention.

So much for the plants and the pets. When it comes to us, if we are not well we look for a pill, a machine, an exercise or a book. We think that the right thing will do the trick. It won’t - for the simple reason we are at the very least as complicated as plants and animals.

Our wellness depends on a combination of the right things in good balance - just like the tomato plant. What are the right things?

The Family Wellness Rainbow says that the right things are Fitness, Relationships, Know-How, Family Life, Values and Faith. Miss one and we don’t have it; just like the tomato plant would be without sunshine.

Why can we act dumb about our own wellness? There are reasons. One is our pace that tells us that we need a quick fix now. For another, the advertisers claim wellness with a pill, an exercise machine, a cream or a special food. We are in the habit of solving problems fast because we always have a string of problems facing us.

So, instead of finding wellness we try one thing, then another, then another wasting time and money, neither of which we have.

The Family Wellness Rainbow shows a good way to find wellness. It shows and illustrates the six big ingredients. It shows how to be practical by setting one wellness goal at a time.

FWR says: The Family Wellness Rainbow is worth a try -


FWR Asks: Are we facing a social tsunami?

We have enjoyed fifty wonderful years compared to any other people on the planet. We have been safe. We have been prosperous. We enjoy the protection of big medical, social and pension programs. We have charge cards we use to get what we want.

The big question is: Will all this last, or we in for a big change?

Here are some of the danger signs:

  • Our social programs can’t handle all the problems
  • Our economy is tied to the big U.S. debt.
  • We face new levels of terror threats
  • Our churches, schools and families are looking unsteady
  • We face new race and religious challenges
  • We are short of visionary leadership

We adults are probably going to be OK. Our children and grandchildren may be facing a new kind of world:

  • Jobs will be scarce
  • Credit will shrink
  • Violence could become commonplace
  • All will have to do with less
  • Beliefs and morals will be different

Nobody knows how things will go. If huge changes are coming, the big question is:

Will our kids and grandkids be ready?

It is easy to feel helpless in the face of the big powers. We can’t really change governments, business, media, religions or other people.

Here is what we can do. We can build our families. Why is that so important? Two reasons - our society rests on the foundation of the families and Family Wellness is something we can change. Now, most of us need to learn more about family wellness and its benefits.

The Family Wellness Rainbow, developed by the Markham Institute, gives us a clear and simple way for families to make home life better. Besides, only the family can make a difference. The professionals can advise but wellness is entirely in family hands.

FWR Says: Families can face tougher times together, please see:

Friday, October 12, 2012


FWR Says:  Here are some Parent Wellness Stages

Parents learn by doing. All are at different stages. Here are some stages:

Teen Mother: F

It is not possible to bring up a child in wellness by a person who has yet to find him/herself. The only answer is to find a caring person with lots of parenting experience to be your coach.

Newlyweds: D

Your problem is that you have no experience or training in raising children. Classes, books and CD’s won’t do it. Your big resource is you own family. Pick a mom, dad, grandparent, uncle, aunt - who have the experience. Use their advice.

Young Parents: C

Your learning curve may be starting to dip. You may still be practicing the mistakes drawn from your own childhood. Your children are on upward learning curves. You need to try to keep up with your kids learning.

Grandparents: B

These good folks have learned child raising the hard way, (the only way). They have made mistakes. That is how they learned. They are appalled at some of your styles with your children. These grandparents are a rich resource. They are waiting to be asked. Start taking their “old fashioned” views seriously.

Regular parents: A

By experience, you have learned that parenting requires teamwork. Better to be together, even if you are wrong. You now know that children learn mainly through example. So your first job is to see that you are OK. After that things get to be good.

One good way to check out your child raising lifestyle is the Family Wellness Rainbow. It shows the big wellness features most needed. It shows how to work on your family wellness, one goal at a time.

Please see:

FWR Says: Raising children to live well is the parent’s most demanding job

Friday, October 05, 2012


FWR Says:  Family Wellness - Just Do It!

What’s the most important thing? Answer: our wellness. OK, what’s even more important? The wellness of our children and grandchildren. So what is holding us back?

A person who wants to be a doctor, prepares by college, study, practice and then doing it. He/she actually learns medicine from the daily practice of seeing patients and keeping up to date.

A person who wants to be a plumber must go to school, become an apprentice and if all goes well, he becomes an experienced plumber as he continuously does the job. There is no better teacher than experience.

If it is true for doctors and for plumbers why isn’t it true for parents? We are not trained. We start practice on our first kid. Here we are doing the most important job with no preparation.

Why are we being so dumb? One, there is no training available. Two, our community professionals have little wellness experience. Three, we are too busy. We all know people who endanger their health by being too busy. That is dumb. We are endangering our family’s wellness if we concentrate on some single approach to wellness using one product, one activity or one family saying.

Fortunately, help is on the way. One way is the Family Wellness Rainbow that lays out the essentials of wellness and shows how a goal can start the growth process. For details please see:

FWR Says: Wellness comes from daily discipline - not a one shot deal