JIMMY'S BEST CHANCE

FWR Tells: A tale of two Jimmies

The first Jimmy is 8 years old with trouble concentrating at school. He is a quiet boy, but overweight.

Parents get a call from the school to meet regarding Jimmy’s learning difficulties. He finds it difficult to concentrate. At the meeting, the parents agree to some special interviews to see how to help him.

This good school system has special education teachers and psychologists. Jimmy has several interviews followed by a meeting with the parents. At that meeting the school staff recommends referral to a doctor for medication that would help Jimmy concentrate.

The medication helps.

The second Jimmy is the same age with the same school adjustment problems. After a meeting with the teacher, the parents decide to pay extra attention to Jimmy.

Jimmy comes to breakfast after making his bed. He is complimented on his homework. When getting ready for school, his Mom suggests he stick close to his best friend when the bully is around. After a hug he is off to school. After school he has several things to do. He can play with his friends, look after the garbage and set the table for dinner. If he still has time he can use his computer – no videos or games on school days.

After family dinner together, Jimmy can play but must do his homework. At bedtime one parent reads with him and stays with him for prayers.

What are the big differences between the two Jimmies? In the first case, Jimmy gets a new learning problem. Before, he was just fat. Now, he is fat with a learning problem. The big issue here is that Jimmy is viewed as a boy with a problem. The school does good work, however the medication eases but does not fix the problem.

With the second Jimmy, the big issue is attention by the parents. Jimmy gets the message that they care and he counts. He becomes more settled at home and is ready to learn at school.

A large research project in Atlanta was designed for 120 of the most troubled families in the city. In it, parents set goals for themselves with highly successful results. The independent research consultant claimed the most promising results were school adjustments that came from new attention at home. Pretty simple - the child is more settled to learn when the family is more settled.

FWR Says: Family Wellness is all about quality time with each other.